74 Postings and she's not here yet... Sounds like the start to a bad joke. I am waiting for Bob to get home so we can watch Lost. I was watching Season 2 of Project Runway. Not sure who watches that from work and reads this but Santio reminds me of Sam...Something about his rambling and the way he talks, funny thing is he's from St.Charles! Cracked me up.
Went to the Mall today, went to Pottery Barn and Macy's and found nothing.. Got Bubble Tea without the bubble, not in the mood for tapioca. I am on a massive sugar kick today, I ate a packet of Peeps, and almost a whole sleeve of GS Cookies.. WTF! I have done so well so far, what was going on with me. I think I am sad, scared and ready all at once.
Patti called, she said "What time is Monday anyway?" I said "We get there at 6:30 or we leave whenever they call actually, why?" She says " I just wanted to know what time to get there" I laugh and say "You can come up when we call you, I will not let you in before that". She then says "Don't you need support and people there>", "No, I have a lot going on and this is a big thing for me, I need Bob and I need to be calm, the last thing I need is anyone else in the room while I am in pain and scared" I then end with "I don't want to hurt your feelings but please don't come up until we call, I will not let you in".
People This is not a picnic! This is not a party! This is my life, I am not on a show, or part of a show. I am fine if Melissa wants to tape her delivery or if anyone else wants to do what they want. I have had friends that recently went into labor and were there for 26 hours THEN had a C-Section! You think you have seen crabby outta me? Try to crash my labor, that's gonna get you looking like Charlie Rose!
Love to you all, seriously but for the Love of all that is good and holey, treat me like I am a person, I am not holding up anyone's life (she's doing that on her own, I am doing all I can to get her here), I am not stopping the world from spinning, I am not your entertainment, and for God sake, I am not HIDING anything! FUCK! Cut me some slack, treat me like you understand how I feel.. I am being a drama queen here, Yes, please get me a mirror... No More.. Seriously, if this is disrupting your fucking life so much, don't talk to me, make it easier on us both, don't fucking call me and Huff in my Fucking Ear because things are not happening the way YOU want them to happen! My body is aching, and sore, and swollen, I feel like I am failing already even having this kid on time and I can't sleep and I can't eat half the things I want, I can't and have not had a drink in months, and I am not a big drinker but YES I NEED ONE NOW! Some of you are mothers and shame on you, I say it again SHAME ON YOU! Try to bring yourself to the point when things were happening to you and you wanted/needed understanding and a friend. I am sure I will get over this, I am sure I will be one of those people that remembers only the grand times and say things like I miss having her in my belly, and I remember _____ (insert mush here) but good really, treat me like this is my life, like I am your friend, daughter, relative, whatever.. that this is something that happens and something that is happening... This is not a soap opera, this is not reality tv, this is not happening at your leisure. I know that I have talked to many of you when you were pregnant and God forbid I was ever a bitch or said some of the things that were rude. I promise you this, your words can be hurtful, more hurtful that you know, more selfish and I can do without it. I don't need to hear that I was Swollen, or that I look Puffy, that I sound tired or what some have called bored but really is pain.
Wonder what kind of crazy I will be without any sleep at all??
Anyone have a white coat I can borrow, I would prefer silver on the straps but my wedding ring isn't fitting now so Gold would be ok too.
11 hours ago